The workplace bully

Ordinarily, the image of a workplace is something like an office, or a factory where workers toil shoulder to shoulder. But a workplace can also consist of people online who work together to create a product. Like a book. Even if the people involved have never met face to face, it’s still a work situation, and workplace mentality still applies.

In relation to another situation entirely, I came across this article that describes the mentality, tactics and definition of a workplace bully, from how to recognize one when you see one to what to do if that happens.

Paraphrased from Kickbully:
The manipulator finds clever and indirect means to control others. He deceives and seduces, or he creates a chaotic, complex situation, allowing him to exploit the naivete and character flaws of others. He has no respect for people who are passive and emotionally weak and vulnerable, so he doesn’t feel bad about exploiting them. He exudes charm and confidence in order to attract those who are naive or emotionally needy, providing them with friendship and camaraderie, or enticing them with promises of future rewards. A bully encourages others to obey him by offering to meet their emotional and financial needs. He promises friendship, respect, career advancement and financial rewards. A bully puts on a good act to gain a victim’s trust and respect.

If a workplace bully can’t convince a victim to follow him willingly, he may try to force them to comply. One of his most powerful weapons is to use subtle threats, obvious threats and emotional blackmail. A bully acts like a victim in order to manipulate others into submitting. He’ll insist that he sacrifices all for the greater good, and that others have exploited his good intentions, claiming that no one appreciates the important things he does for the company, the sacrifices he makes and the pain he suffers. If more than one person points out the absurdity of his claims, he becomes furious as he declares that everyone is ganging up on him.

Any of this sound familiar?

There’s nothing quite like that moment when a charismatic bully first shows you his true colors. From that moment on, everything he says and does seems like a fraud. You begin to wonder how you ever believed his deceptions. But then, looking around, you realize that everyone else continues to be taken in by his act, as if they are hypnotized by the sound of his voice.

Welcome to the strange and dangerous world of a two-faced bully.

Read through the pages at Kickbully to see how to first recognize and then deal with the workplace bully.

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24 thoughts on “The workplace bully

  1. Even though you make no mention of we know who, you still manage to associate something with her.

    I thought this was about the next chapter but as it seems you sre running a bit late.

    It also seems Phoenix has gained quite a few new members. Although there are a few missing. But seems Tabetha Jones took that leap down the rabbit hole and the curious and curiouser things got she outsmarted several.

    Oh the things that you find in wonderland. Tell me Lepp are you an attorney, psychologist, or publishing specialist? I didnt think so. Yet you fill these peoples minds with rubbish.

    I say off with your head .. that is presuming you have one.

    I do also believe that if you liked Ms Jones you wouldnt dismissed her pictures. God doesnt like ugly for those if you that spoke harshly about her.

    I do see where Ms Jones said a few things that were upsetting but i also see where she has been kind and considerate even congragulating your daughter.

    I also recall a post saying you would be removing and deleting your blogs about you so screen shot them while you can.

    You say Tabetha is not a woman of her word when it is clear she is the better person here because you failed to do as you said.

    Now i have a date dont want to be late for tea. The rabbit seems to get awfulky mad if im late.

    Good day

    • Jackie, I can’t tell you how much it saddens me to see you lower yourself to this level. For awhile, you really seemed like somebody I could come to call friend. But that was just an act you were playing to try to gather information about me and to hurt the one person who would have been the best friend you ever had: Sabrina.
      Instead, you continue to ally yourself with the likes of Tabetha, wallowing in the shallows of depravity and deception. That’s your choice, though, so go ahead and live it. Cackle with glee at whatever sick little games you and your partner in crime (literally) think you’re playing. Good luck with that, and see where it gets you.

      And, Tabetha, again, I gave you no word to stand by. You keep repeating that. Yes, there was a point where I was so sick of having you in my life on any level, so much so that I was ready to remove all of this and just walk away. But you had to be ugly to me, here on my blog, while I was gone coping with a loss. So I decided to leave it, let the world see how ugly you really are ‘neath the skin.
      You’re just pissed because now the world can still see the truth about you. You just don’t like that you weren’t able to run me off. You’re miffed that you can’t get rid of me and spin this blog away as just being “hate” or “lies.”
      Don’t like it? Well, suck it up, buttercup. You earned it. Every word of it. It’s your own fault that it’s still here, and forever will be.
      Maybe if you weren’t such an asshole, nobody would have anything to write about you. Have you ever, for a second, considered that?
      No. I guess you haven’t. More’s the pity.

      • JT I have no idea why you would have brought me into this! I didn’t write the Real Mad Hatter. So I suggest you leave me alone! No I wasn’t Tabetha’s spy I had not talked to her until the night I posted on your blog. Yes I am back with Phoenix Fire and I love being back with Tabetha! So have a pleasant day!

      • IP’s don’t lie, dear, unlike the self-supposed executives of a certain bogus publishing company I could name (but don’t need to).

        Not bogus? Really. Let’s see your articles of incorporation, then. They’re a matter of public record, but I’ll bet that if I search, I won’t be able to find ’em in any of the lower 48, let alone the state you or your partner live in.

        Want to prove your company is on the up-and-up? Let’s see those articles of incorporation. And let’s see ’em on the secretary of state’s web page, from whatever state you filed ’em in. Don’t insult any of us by printing out some papers and expecting us to believe they’re official. LLC’s are listed with the SOS, and appear online. So all you have to do is hook us up with a link.

        I’ve waited years for proof that Tab’s got this lawyer she keeps threatening people with, but she just can’t put her money where her mouth is. Let’s see what you’re made of. Substance or hot air?

        You visit here practically every hour on the hour, either because you’re as obsessed as your boss, or at her behest because she doesn’t want her own IP to keep showing up on my tracker. Use one of ’em to post that link for us.
        We’ll wait.

    • When you stop lurking on everyone’s blogs, perhaps we will believe your assertion that you don’t care. And enough with the exclamation points – they do not underscore sincerity.

      • You don’t lurk?
        Right.

        Note the IP

        And

        From IP

        Pensylvania and Maryland? Remind us again. You live in West Virginia, right?

        Look at the number of visits from those IP’s alone, and that’s just yesterday and today.

        Tell me again how you don’t lurk?

        Yeah. You’re right where you belong: in bed with your current boss. You two deserve each other.
        And the sad thing is, you probably take that as a compliment.

    • You have more things to do? That’s why you, your boss and a whole host of your proxies show up on this very blog just about every hour on the hour.
      If there’s a blogger that’s bogus, it’s the one that can’t even come up with their own identity and has to rip off Hatter’s.

  2. Well I certainly dont live in Copperas Cove but that’s where my IP pops up at probably that where the main signal from Time Warner Cable runs. As for The Real Mad I have my suspicions building on that one if you care to share. Seeing as this person has visited both the Mad Hatters and yours. Do the IP addresses match on both sites? And dear Mad Hatter you asked so kindly for the lady to come visit you then you don’t even approve my post. I was qu

    • You were qu… What? And I explained on my blog why I didn’t approve ANY other comments – some ” for” you and some “against” you. I said on my blog what I wanted to say about you, and no, I will not approve any comments concerning you (and no more have come in, interestingly enough, since I posted the entry clarifying that my blog was not a “Tabetha Jones” site.
      And if you really want to know my other reason for not posting your “lady-like reply: no matter how nicely you attempted to appear, not only did you cross talk to other comments, but I found your demands on how I should act on my own blog were both ridiculous and insulting. I did you a favor by not approving it.
      However, just because my blog doesn’t revolve around you, that does not mean I won’t comment on the blogs of others.

    • And I never requested your presence. I simply wondered if you were going be able to refrain from commenting, and when the time came when you just had to comment, if you could behave as a lady.
      However, if you like me to post your message and address it as a blog entry, just say the word. I’ll be waiting…

      • And miss out on the attention? Don’t worry. She’ll be there. If she can take time out from creating new ID’s to pad her bogus company with, that is.

        Still waiting to see those articles of incorporation.

      • It really doesn’t if Tabs popped up and said, “Go for it!” I have no interest in feeding her NPD.
        But maybe I should send you screencaps of all of Jackie’s lurking? They don’t seem to understand that we are given so much more information than just an IP address.

      • Believe me, if it were just a matter of feeding her ego, I’d hit the bricks. But in this case, the more information there is to the public at large about a scam company, the better chance there is that fewer victims will suffer.
        It’s much more than just IP information on display, here, at your place, and whatever bogus blogs they set up. Just about every word they utter shows a staggering level of immaturity, un-professionalism and ineptitude. Anybody considering signing or staying with them need only see their own words to realize that there’s nothing professional about them that any author or model interested in a REAL career wants.
        It’s really sad that even with Jackie, Jaimie and Katrina TRYING to help her out, Tabetha still can’t get it right. It’s like watching the Keystone cops.

    • There’s those unwavering spelling, grammatical and writing skills we’ve all come to expect.

      We both know that the oh, so original “real” Hatter is posting from a proxy that bounces everywhere from Washington State to Tampa Florida, so there’s no point. Whoever you’re trying to frame, you’ll have to do it some other way.

  3. You know why Tab wants your phone number so bad don’t you Lep? She wants it so that she can try and get you arrested to harassment or maybe even something worse. Don’t worry I won’t give it to her. Your safe.

    • I’m not worried about it. She’s not going to get my number. And she’s not smart enough to set up a scheme like that. If anything, she’d spam me like she does her ex(es). Then I’d get HER busted for harassment, stalking, whatever.
      But since she’s not going to get my number anyway, I’m not worried about it at all.

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