It’s coming up on the 25th anniversary of the death of Def Leppard’s legendary guitarist, Steve Clark. Fans the world over still miss him, as do his family and loved ones.
It is also around this time of year that one of Steve’s ex girlfriends parades out her past association with him to garner attention for herself by holding prayer vigils, candlelight remembrances, and even by pulling his old clothes out of mothballs to wave around.
I’ve made no secret of my disdain for these actions. That woman was not the “star-crossed lover” she makes herself out to be. She was not his only link to reality, or his “princess in the golden tower,” or however else she presents herself. It’s simply not the truth. She was his EX girlfriend. Not his wife. Not even his current girlfriend. She was months (years?) removed from his life, by his own choice.
He wanted nothing to do with her, and even swore out restraining papers to prevent her from contacting him. Steve was living with the woman he loved at the time of his death, the woman he planned to marry. No matter what anybody thought of her, that was the only woman Steve ever chose to marry. The wedding dress was bought and ready, and they were a matter of weeks away from becoming man and wife. Very shortly, his ring was scheduled to be placed on her finger. Not the ex’s. Not even close.
Yet his ex parades herself around as his one and only true love, soaking up all the sympathy Steve’s fans lavish upon her, and taking any chance she can to plug her book. “I miss Steve. Buy my book (which is little more than her self-serving glorification of their time together).” Hardly the grieving widow she pretends to be, she comes across more as an opportunistic social climber, grasping at the memory of his fame.
It saddens me when I see her inserting herself into his memory every chance she gets, particularly around the time of his death, now that he’s not around to speak up for himself. Neither is his fiance, who has since joined her husband in death.
I would hope that Steve’s fans would honor the choices he made while he was still alive. He wanted his ex nowhere near his life. I would hope to see them respect his wishes and refuse to lavish so much attention upon somebody he didn’t want in his life, ESPECIALLY now that he’s not around to defend himself.
I’m not saying that nobody should befriend her, or that she should be shunned or abused in any way. She has her past with him, and has every right to cling desperately to it, if that’s the only identity she’s got. More power to her. I’m only suggesting that his memory should be free of her, as he chose for his life to be.
If nothing else, I would hope that his fans would choose not to participate in any pretentious ritual ego-stroke put on by someone who stalks his memory like a prey she can never truly possess. I would certainly hope that none of them send her any more money. I think she’s already benefited plenty at his expense.
I know that some of the people I’m friends with on FB are friends with her as well. I hope they understand that I mean no personal disrespect to any of them. These are my own humble opinions, spoken from a place of honesty and respect for a great man that was lost far too soon.
Rock on, people.